RAQ: The Star Chamber Rarely-Asked-Questions List

We hope this compendium of infrequently posed queries, painstakingly gathered across many years of operation, will clear up some of the mystery surrounding the Star Chamber.

Don’t see your favorite rarely asked question here? Send a note to the RAQ Master at raq@starchamber.com and we’ll add it to the list.

Q: Are you Star Chamber guys really all the same person, only with a bizarre split personality disorder?

A: No.

Q: Who were the Hittites?

A: Now that’s a rarely asked question. During the second millennium B.C. the Indo-European people known as the Hittites ruled over the “Land of Hatti,” in central and eastern Anatolia (the peninsula which is modern Turkey). They had displaced the previous occupants, the non-Indo-European Hattians, and ruled from the city of Hattusas near the modern Boghazkoy in northern central Turkey, possibly as early as 1900 B.C.

Q: Do you live in a big wacky house like the Partridge Family?

A: No. But the Star Chamber corporate headquarters comprises a large campus, and depending on your taste, you may consider some of the Frank Gehry buildings to be, as you say, “wacky.” Also, much like the Partridge Family, we have madcap misadventures every week. But the answer to your question is no.

Q: Is your site loosely based on the 1983 movie “The Star Chamber” starring Michael Douglas and Hal Holbrook?

A: Surprisingly, yes.

Q: Really?

A: No. Not really. I just wanted to see your reaction.

Q: Do you live in a big wacky house like the Partridge Family?

A: If you ask me that one more time, it won’t be a rarely-asked question anymore and I’ll be forced to strike it from the list. Think of the others and please be more considerate with your questions.

Q: Are these questions submitted by real people, or are you just making them up?

A: What do you think? You’re the one asking the question.

Q: I see. So they’re completely made up.

A: That’s not a question.

Q: Why are you called The Star Chamber anyway?

A: I’m afraid that particular question is frequently asked. You’ll need to refer to our FAQ, which sadly has not yet been written.

Q: Do you live in a big wacky house like the Hittites?

A: Ha ha. Okay, that’s enough questions.

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